Manifesting can be a double-edged sword; you attract what you believe you’re worth, regardless of its truth. Thus, if you’re consumed by fears and possess low self-esteem, those negative emotions and beliefs will subconsciously drive you to manifest your fears. I’m sure that’s not your intention, which is why you’re here—to learn how to stop manifesting your fears. Before we explore solutions, let’s gain a deeper understanding of fear.
What Is Fear and How Does It Impact Your Manifestation Negatively?
Most of us view fear solely as a negative and bad emotion, but do you know it serves as a fundamental survival mechanism to protect us from perceived threats or anger? When we face things that we are afraid of, fear triggers physiological and psychological responses that prepare the body to fight the fear or flee from it.
While fear can be adaptive and protective, excessive or irrational fear can impair our manifestation based on how we interpret and respond to it.
When fear appears yet you keep compounding it with more negative thoughts, you will succumb to a downward spiral. According to the law of attraction, what you believe strongly will manifest by itself. As one of the strongest emotions, when fear becomes all that you can think and believe, your energy level, thoughts and actions will be off. Not only can you not manifest what you want but worse, you attract what you don’t want.
However, if you view fear as a warning signal and avoid obsessing over it, you’ll be able to respond to fears more positively by aligning your actions to overcome them. Therefore, understanding fear’s inherent role in our survival is crucial so we can face our fears with greater composure. It’s also important to learn to identify unfounded and excessive fears to avoid reckless responses, which can lead to manifestation failure.
Here are some of the untrue fears that will sabotage your manifestation:
- You fear that others think you are stupid because you try a new approach to the problem.
- You fear that others judge your body when you want to go to the gym for a workout.
- You fear that your romantic interest will leave you once you voice out your needs.
- You fear that you cannot find a better half so you settle down for an unhappy relationship.
- You fear that your colleagues see you as bossy because you volunteer to lead a project.
- You fear that the school you pick will be a bad choice due to some bad experiences that people share online although you have heard good experiences from the seniors.
- You fear that you cannot make new friends because you think you are poor and boring.
These fears can be addressed, and I’ve overcome several myself. If your fears aren’t listed here, let’s jot them down, and we’ll tackle them together in the last section.
Signs That You Are Manifesting Your Fears
If you are not sure if you are manifesting your fears, here are some indicators to watch for:
- You constantly feel that you are not good enough for what you’re trying to manifest.
- You are obsessed with the worst possible scenarios.
- You doubt your ability to manifest your desires.
- You don’t believe that The Universe has the best plan for you.
- You seek to know your future through fortune-telling or tarot readings and are disturbed by any negative insights.
- You dismiss compliments from others about your talents.
If you realise that you are having these signs in your manifestation efforts, stop what you are doing. It’s time to identify your fears and face them bravely.
Why You Are Manifesting Your Fears
Before learning how to stop manifesting your fears, let’s learn more about the reasons so that you can tackle the problem from its roots.
You are not aware of your subconsciousness
Imagine an iceberg with a small tip and an immense ice body beneath the water’s surface. Similarly, our subconscious mind encompasses vast depths beyond what meets the eye, while our conscious mind is just the tip visible above the surface.
The subconscious mind is made up of thoughts, memories, and emotions that rarely pop up in our minds during our waking hours. It is where some of our deepest fears hide.
Bruce H. Lipton’s studies suggest that around 95% of our actions, thoughts, and emotions are driven by the subconscious mind. Regardless of how strongly we want to ignore the fears hidden in the subconscious mind, they will still influence our belief system and actions beyond our awareness.
You are intimidated by fear
Fear is a natural emotion that prevents us from danger. We all have fears, but fearing fears makes it worse because we jump straight to reckless actions without acknowledging and processing our fears. Remember, acting on impulsive thoughts never turns out well and this is often why you manifest your fears.
When we face uncertainty, shocks and dangers, we should calm ourselves instead of jumping into a fight or flee mode—unless, of course, we’re being chased by a tiger. For example, if you are facing rejection from your love interest, resist the urge to give up on or take revenge on him or her. Instead, take a moment to centre yourself.
Take a deep breath and experience fully how you are feeling without any judgement or actions. Validate your emotions, process them, and let them pass through you. If you feel like taking a few breaths is not enough, consider writing them down in your journal, or going into meditation.
When you can master processing your emotions without suppressing, rationalising and over-amplifying them, you already win because fears are losing their power over you.
You give your power to fear
When you feel like you’re afraid to jump, that’s exactly when you need to jump. Otherwise, you’ll end up staying in the same place forever.
– Unknown
Now that you’ve successfully processed your fears and prevented yourself from reacting to them impulsively, it’s time to take action to overcome what you’re fearful of. You can choose to face your fears directly or gradually overcome them using the six-step guide outlined below.
These steps might be experimental, and you might experience failure in the first few tries, but that’s okay. Just like how we didn’t master running since infancy but started with crawling, then walking, and eventually running, with many falls in between. Be proud of yourself for trying.
6-Step CBT Integrative Healing Ritual to Stop Manifesting Your Fears
Before we start delving deep into how to stop manifesting your fears, please ensure you are in a safe space with a calm mind. As this process requires some shadow work, it can be as intense as you want it to be. Don’t fret, you don’t have to do it with anyone, just yourself.
1. List down the things you want to manifest
Let’s start by asking yourself what you truly desire and finding out the reasons behind these desires. To ensure that what you want to manifest is genuinely beneficial for you, consider the following questions:
- Do you understand why you want to manifest this?
- Is your desired manifestation legal and, at the very least, not harmful to others?
- Does it align with the life you envision for yourself in the next 5-10 years?
- Is your decision influenced by societal pressures?
- Can you envision yourself being fulfilled after achieving your manifestation?
- Are you aware of what it will take to achieve this manifestation?
If you answered yes to these questions, congratulations! You now have a clearer understanding of what you wish to manifest and possess stronger conviction in your ability to do so. The clarity and positive intentions will give you the strength to face any fears that may arise along the way.
Let’s take an example and we will use it throughout the 6-step guide.
Elle is a 35-year-old professional with 12 years of work experience, having transitioned into the data analytics field three years ago. She’s aiming for her next career milestone as a team lead/manager.
Recently, her boss assigned her to lead two junior data analysts. However, Elle is overwhelmed by fear. Her lack of confidence during a presentation disappointed her boss, who then faced scrutiny from his superiors regarding the decision to promote Elle.
Elle recognizes that succumbing to her fears isn’t an option, yet she’s unsure of how to address them.
From this example, it is clear that Elle knows what she wants to manifest, which is to become a team lead. This is an excellent thing to manifest and she could answer all questions about her manifestation above. The one that is stopping her from advancing is her fears.
2. Write down your fears
Now that we have a clear manifestation goal, let’s write down the fears that potentially hinder us from reaching it. As fears can shape the reality we believe in, it is not surprising to see how often we are not aware of the sabotage that fears have caused in creating the life we envision.
Using Elle’s example, let’s write down what are the fears she might have:
- Some colleagues, who have been in their positions longer but weren’t promoted to manager, might resent me for becoming a leader.
- I have never led anyone before, I don’t know if I can be a leader.
- I’m not as confident and well-spoken as my male counterparts.
- My past mistakes might lead to my juniors thinking I am not qualified to lead them.
- My missteps in front of my boss’s boss may have left an impression of incompetence.
- I feel I’ve let my boss down and doubt if I can regain his confidence in me.
For this step, write down your fears and beliefs on paper; we’ll use this list later. Don’t hold back—express all your thoughts without judgment. We’ll address and combat these fears in the next section.
3. Combat these thoughts with rationality
Fears stem from “hot thoughts,” a term in psychology for automatic, emotionally intense thoughts that can cause distress or problematic behaviours. These thoughts quickly surface from the subconscious, influenced by past experiences, upbringing, peer influences, media, and education.
As the fears and distress caused by the hot thoughts after negative events will derail your manifestation journey by amplifying fears, it is crucial to Identify and address these hot thoughts.
Here’s a cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) practice that you can use to combat the hot thoughts and the irrational fears they cause. With your fears listed on paper, tackle them individually using the method outlined below.
Let’s use one of Elle’s fears as an example:
| Fear/limiting belief/thought | I have never led anyone before, I don’t know if I can be a leader. |
| Factual evidence for the thought | People like my CEO and my boss seem to be natural-born leaders. They lead people so effortlessly. |
| Factual against the thought | – My boss did not become a leader since the start of his career. He is a good leader now because he learns from his past 13 years of leadership experience. – I helped my juniors solve their work issues and gave career advice. – My boss is willing to mentor me, and I can learn from my boss. I can learn from leadership books and podcasts. |
| What’s the best-case and worst-case scenario of this situation? What’s the likelihood that the worst case will happen? | – Best case: I successfully lead my juniors and help them grow in the company. – Worst case: I did not lead my juniors well and they complained to my boss. – The likelihood of the worst case happening is very low because I will ask for feedback from my juniors and learn from it before they get escalated into complaints to my boss. |
| How might someone else view the situation? | Other experienced leaders might think that I just need to take the first step and learn on the go. |
| Does it help me to think this way? | No. The hot thought is stopping me from appreciating the opportunity given and start learning how to become a leader. |
| Replace your hot thoughts with balanced thoughts | Although I haven’t held a leadership role before, it doesn’t mean I can’t learn to be a leader. I’ve assisted my juniors with assignments and have the necessary experience and expertise. I need to enhance my leadership skills, including design thinking, communication, and visionary leadership. |
4. Burn your worries and fears away
Everything you want is on the other side of fear.
– George Addair
Now that you know your limiting beliefs and fears are invalid, it’s time to free yourself from them.
We will carry out a simple ritual to clear the fears and unhelpful beliefs from your body, mind and soul.
- Prepare a glass or ceramic bowl and a lighter.
- Bring your tools and the paper you wrote to a safe place without much wind movement. We’re about to carry out a burning ritual.
- Hold your papers and burn them in the bowl.
- Make sure the paper turns to ashes completely.
If your fears are particularly sticky, you might find they take longer to burn away.
Reflect on how you feel as you watch those daunting fears and beliefs turn to ashes. Does your body feel lighter? Are you experiencing less anxiety and feeling more relief?
5. Write down positive affirmations
With your attempt to remove untrue fears and beliefs from your system, let’s write down positive affirmations to counter your past fears and beliefs.
Here are some examples taken from Elle’s fears:
| Fears | Affirmations |
| I have never led anyone before, I don’t know if I can be a leader. | – I am capable of growing into a strong leader. – Every great leader starts somewhere; I am on my path now. – Leadership can be learned, and I am an eager student. |
| I’m not as confident and well-spoken as my male counterparts. | – My voice is unique and valuable in its authenticity. – Confidence is built through action, and I am taking steps every day. – Being well-spoken is a skill I can develop with time and patience. |
| My missteps in front of my boss’s boss may have left an impression of incompetence. | – I learn and evolve from every mistake I make. – My past does not define my potential to lead. – Juniors will see my growth and be inspired by my resilience. |
You can write your affirmations on a piece of paper or card. Once you’ve finished, say them out loud to reinforce the positive energy you just gained.
Feelings are better than words and visualisation; they are tied to your well-being as a whole. Embrace the positive energy fully.
6. Reclaim your power
Now that you have completed a detox to your belief system and rewired it with positive affirmations, it is time to regain your power to manifest what you want.
No longer influenced by your fears, you can review your next steps more objectively and act aligned with your new belief system.
If some of your fears resurface or you realise you have some hidden fears, feel free to repeat the session if you need to, but I advise you to not do it too frequently, at most once a month.
Please note that this is a tool to help you with manifestation, you should not get too reliant on it. The aligned actions that you take after this session are what will turn you from a dreamer to a doer, and eventually enjoy the harvest of your manifestation.
Understand your fears and know when to grow beyond that
Fears exist to protect us from perceived threats. Some protect us from floods, tigers, and sharp objects, while others hinder us from unlocking our full potential.
Fear kills more dreams than failure ever will.
– Suzy Kassem
Understanding which fears to confront and dissolve with rationality opens up new perspectives. This enables us to debunk limiting beliefs and gain faith in ourselves and our ability to manifest.
Manifestation is rooted in self-love. As you enhance your self-worth, the fears that once haunted you can no longer confine you. Instead of manifesting your fears, you will begin to manifest what the new you believe you deserve.
With the 6-step guide on how to stop manifesting your fears, are you ready for the new chapter in your manifesting journey? Let’s go!
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